So today's thoughts:
I had my audition last Friday morning at 11am before I flew out for a quick weekend trip to Oklahoma for my sister's 50th birthday party. The casting director described my 1st take as perfect and then gave me two other takes with some re-directions to switch things up a bit.

As I finished she told me that they were 3 great takes and I went on my way. However btw take 2 and 3 I noticed that I inadvertently dropped a line on the last page. AHHH! I never, NEVER drop lines. Oye vey. I wanted the performance to be perfect. Her line before mine (can't say exactly what it was, copyright) made me think she had skipped that part, when in actuality she didn't. Luckily the line I gave made sense (it was a simple question, i.e. why was that, etc) and it ran smoothly but still. Ryan and Jo think I should take the compliment that a major casting office described a performance of mine as 'perfect' but its hard to, because, well, it wasn't perfect. And casting directors say things all the time. Granted if they don't like you they just say thanks and let you go, but I just can't shake the feeling that I'm this colossal screw up sometimes. I got a lot of anxiety about it on the plane ride to Oklahoma, like I let everyone down and I was embarrassed about it.

But as hard as it is for me I'm trying to take the positive from it. Next time I need to KNOW all my partner's lines also in case they're ambiguous, and just get back to work. Working actors work like dogs, and I'm not cut out to be an attorney. That part of me, the lawyer part however much it was, died a while ago and I'm glad. I don't like working with lawyers, they're mean. So to work.